Kiss Me Out Of Desire, Not Consolation
by Axel Danger Flynn VIII
Summary: Merry Christmas Maria. Very short, set to "Last Goodbye" by Jeff Buckley. SuzakuxLelouch. ONESHOT; SPOILERS.


_This is our last goodbye,  
__I hate to feel the love between us die.__  
But it's over,__  
Just hear this and then I'll go.__  
You gave me more to live for,  
More than you'll know._

_This is our last embrace,__  
Must I dream and always see your face?__  
Why can't we overcome this wall?  
Maybe it's cause I didn't know you at all._

_Kiss me,  
__Please kiss me.__  
Kiss me out of desire,__  
Baby, not consolation.  
You know what makes me so angry,_  
'_Cause I know that in time,__  
I will only make you cry._

_This is our last goodbye._

_Did you say no this can't happen to me?__  
Did you rush to the phone and call?  
Was there a voice unkind in the back of your mind,  
__Saying maybe you didn't know him at all?__  
You didn't know him at all.  
Oh, you didn't know…_

_While the bells out in the church tower chime,  
__Burning clues into this heart of mine,__  
Thinking so hard on her soft eyes and the memories,  
Offer signs that it is over,_

_It's over…_

**

He'd helped him dress before that. He delicately moved his fingers over the costume he'd worn some many times before, pausing at his lover's chest in the suit to gaze at him longingly. "There's no turning back now," He reminded him, but not at all in a happy tone. The dressed up of the two tugged on the under-mask and went to pull it over his face but the raven haired man stopped him.

He lifted his hands to cup his cheeks, standing on tiptoe to gently kiss him. "Please," He said softly against his lips, his symbolized violet eyes staring into the other's green ones, "This is the last one, so do it like you mean it." His voice cracked and he tried to fight back tears, as the other wrapped an arm around his back to hold him up. "You do mean it, right Suzaku?"

"I'll always mean it, Your Highness." Suzaku said, kissing him again.

"I have acted according to your wishes, and someone has sewn another costume for you." Lelouch said as he delicately brushed a hair from his Knight's eyes.

"Thank you, Emperor Lelouch," He said with a stony face, but his eyes flooding with something else, something more sad.

"No need to be so formal," The other replied, "After all, this is the last time…" His voice faltered and he decided to remain silent, only now staring at his feet. A timer resounded and he looked up dreadfully. "Suzaku, I'm not scared." He said firmly, "Don't you dare even think about being scared."

"I will follow your wishes forever, My Lord." Suzaku replied just as firmly, but he reached out for Lelouch's hands, leaning down to kiss him even as his lord began to cry. Suzaku felt a painful stab at his heart, and he hugged Lelouch tightly. After all, he was the only one he'd ever love again.

**

The world was quiet. The world seemed dark. The Knight sat, waiting, feeling as if he had to wait any longer his heart would explode and he would die right here without fulfilling his duties. But he couldn't die, and it wasn't a miracle. He couldn't go against his Master's wishes or promises he had made either. Lelouch would die like fate promised and Suzaku would be the one to do it-and Lelouch would be only his forever. That's how it seemed.

Something flitted in the depths of his mind, memories maybe; nights only lit by a candle or moonlight, but nothing to connect them to the outside world. They lived in their own world and they would die in it as well. There was the first time it happened-they had denied and pretended too long to just let go of what was there and had been there for a very long time.

Suzaku gulped and held back tears for the sake of this mission, he could cry when it was over and done with. The only thing left for him was dying today, wilting away in his throne before a blade could even touch his skin. He closed his eyes tightly and tried to think of something else but his radio buzzed and he pulled on Zero mask before exiting the tent.

**

"_You can no longer be Suzaku Kururugi, you must be Zero now. Their hero."_

Before he fell down the ramp, Suzaku cried as he heard the words _"I love you"_ and he knew it was their last goodbye.


End file.
